Bianca's Transition

Bianca our beautiful and super bright border collie passed away two days ago on October 9. She had been rescued from a terrible owner by a generous neighbor, who then brought her over to our house for us to adopt her. She lived with us for almost four years. She suffered from kidney disease. We gave her plenty of care and very deep love. She reciprocated our love with depth, loyalty and joy.

A week before her passing she told an animal communicator that, even though she was not afraid of dying, she would have liked to pass to the afterlife while I was holding her in my arms. A month before, she had told the animal communicator that, even though at the time she was not quite ready to transition, she would want to go once she became incontinent. She explained that she was still working on her spiritual life. She had learnt a lot during the past few years because she had received unconditional love. The day before she passed I asked her to please let me know when she was ready to go to the afterlife. “I don’t want you to be in pain,” I told her. She looked at me with her deep brown eyes. “I’m concerned about you and Daddy,” her eyes said.

The answer came right before dawn. Thomas, my partner and her Dad, heard her cry in pain. He tried to help her get up and walk to the bathroom to pee. Her legs couldn’t hold her anymore. She peed on the bedroom floor and on Thomas. “The time has come,” he said. “Yes,” I said. We covered our bed with pads. We cleaned the floor. He lifted her and put her on the bed between us. We slept for a few hours. I had the most delightful dreams while holding her.

Once we got up, Bianca showed me that she couldn’t eat anymore. Thomas made an appointment with the vet. I talked to my late husband, as I often do. He reassured me that the time had come and the tribe of our animals was waiting for her. A friend came over to say goodbye. Bianca knew and kissed her. More friends—her favorite neighbors—came over afterwards to comfort us.

She was put to sleep in my arms, as she had requested. Minutes after her passing, her body felt heavy while an incredible energy and light invaded the room. They had all come to get her.

I still feel her presence in the house and I’m starting to see her even for just a quick second. We miss her physical presence, her joyful tail wagging, her beautiful snout, and her deep deep eyes searching ours.